Back in the mid 90's when the government shut down for 20+ days, federal employees received pay retroactively.
Our employer has already told us NOT to expect to be paid during the time we are furloughed. However, our Federal Credit Union did offer a short term loan, at 4.99%! Wow, what a deal! I'm so glad that the credit unions can find the silver lining in this national crisis!! Making a profit off employees who a hard up during a shut down! How thoughtful!
But not everyone is trying to make a profit! Z-burger, a local DC chain for burgers and shakes, is offering up FREE hamburgers to furloughed employees in the event a shutdown occurs!
http://www.zburger.com/
Nom nom nom!
Monday, September 30, 2013
Surviving the Shutdown!
Let's say you did not stock up, or if you are really hungry and have no money, or if your neighbor who works at the FDA came by and stole all your food with his AR-15. It's time to get creative! Here is a guide on how to identify which plants and berries are safe to eat (bonus, you'll likely lose a ton of weight):
Separate a plant into parts. Some plants have edible parts and poisonous parts. In order to test if a plant is edible, you actually just want to check if one part (leaf, stem, or root) of one kind of plant is edible. After you have separated the plant into parts, inspect each part you are preparing for parasites. If you encounter worms or small insects inside the plant, discontinue the test with that sample and consider seeking a different sample of the same plant. Evidence of worms, parasites or insects indicates that the plant is rotten, especially if the organism has vacated the plant. Many parts of plants are only edible during certain seasons (for example, acorns collected after the fall are usually rotten). If you find grubs inside the plant, the plant is rotting, but the grubs are edible and contain high amounts of protein (although they taste sour and are gritty).
Find out if the plant is contact-poisonous. A contact-poisonous plant is one that causes a reaction merely by touching your skin. Rub the selected plant part on the inside of your elbow or wrist. Crush it so that the sap touches your skin, and hold it there for 15 minutes. If the plant causes a reaction in the next 8 hours, do not continue testing that part of that plant.
Prepare a small portion of the plant part. Some plants are poisonous only when raw, so it's a good idea to cook the plant part you are testing if possible. If you can't cook the plant or if you don't anticipate that you will be able to cook it in the future, just test it raw.
Hold a small portion of the prepared plant part against your lip for 3 minutes. Do not put the plant in your mouth. If you notice any burning, tingling, or other reaction, discontinue testing.
Place another small portion of the plant part on your tongue. Hold the plant on your tongue without chewing for 15 minutes. Discontinue testing if you notice any reaction.
Chew the plant and hold it in your mouth for 15 minutes. Chew the plant well, and do not swallow. Discontinue testing if you notice any reaction.
Swallow the small portion of plant.
Wait 8 hours. Do not eat or drink anything during this period except purified water. If you feel sick, immediately induce vomiting and drink plenty of water. If activated charcoal is available, take that with the water. Discontinue testing if you experience any adverse reaction.
Eat 1/4 cup of the same kind of plant part prepared the same way. It is critical that you use exactly the same part of exactly the same kind of plant, and that you prepare it in exactly the same way as you did the initial sample.
Wait an additional 8 hours. Abstain from any other food except purified water. Induce vomiting immediately as above if you should feel ill. If no reaction has occurred, you may assume only that particular part of the plant is safe to eat, and only as prepared during the test.
Begin a new test, if the plant part you have chosen fails any of the tests. If the first plant part you choose appears contact-poisonous, you may immediately test a new plant on your other arm or behind your knee. If the plant causes a reaction before you have swallowed it, wait until the symptoms have disappeared before testing a new plant. If you have an adverse reaction after you've swallowed the plant, wait until symptoms have disappeared and start a new test. Although there may be edible parts of the plant you initially chose, it is preferable to move on to a different plant for subsequent tests.
Separate a plant into parts. Some plants have edible parts and poisonous parts. In order to test if a plant is edible, you actually just want to check if one part (leaf, stem, or root) of one kind of plant is edible. After you have separated the plant into parts, inspect each part you are preparing for parasites. If you encounter worms or small insects inside the plant, discontinue the test with that sample and consider seeking a different sample of the same plant. Evidence of worms, parasites or insects indicates that the plant is rotten, especially if the organism has vacated the plant. Many parts of plants are only edible during certain seasons (for example, acorns collected after the fall are usually rotten). If you find grubs inside the plant, the plant is rotting, but the grubs are edible and contain high amounts of protein (although they taste sour and are gritty).
Find out if the plant is contact-poisonous. A contact-poisonous plant is one that causes a reaction merely by touching your skin. Rub the selected plant part on the inside of your elbow or wrist. Crush it so that the sap touches your skin, and hold it there for 15 minutes. If the plant causes a reaction in the next 8 hours, do not continue testing that part of that plant.
Prepare a small portion of the plant part. Some plants are poisonous only when raw, so it's a good idea to cook the plant part you are testing if possible. If you can't cook the plant or if you don't anticipate that you will be able to cook it in the future, just test it raw.
Hold a small portion of the prepared plant part against your lip for 3 minutes. Do not put the plant in your mouth. If you notice any burning, tingling, or other reaction, discontinue testing.
Place another small portion of the plant part on your tongue. Hold the plant on your tongue without chewing for 15 minutes. Discontinue testing if you notice any reaction.
Chew the plant and hold it in your mouth for 15 minutes. Chew the plant well, and do not swallow. Discontinue testing if you notice any reaction.
Swallow the small portion of plant.
Wait 8 hours. Do not eat or drink anything during this period except purified water. If you feel sick, immediately induce vomiting and drink plenty of water. If activated charcoal is available, take that with the water. Discontinue testing if you experience any adverse reaction.
Eat 1/4 cup of the same kind of plant part prepared the same way. It is critical that you use exactly the same part of exactly the same kind of plant, and that you prepare it in exactly the same way as you did the initial sample.
Wait an additional 8 hours. Abstain from any other food except purified water. Induce vomiting immediately as above if you should feel ill. If no reaction has occurred, you may assume only that particular part of the plant is safe to eat, and only as prepared during the test.
Begin a new test, if the plant part you have chosen fails any of the tests. If the first plant part you choose appears contact-poisonous, you may immediately test a new plant on your other arm or behind your knee. If the plant causes a reaction before you have swallowed it, wait until the symptoms have disappeared before testing a new plant. If you have an adverse reaction after you've swallowed the plant, wait until symptoms have disappeared and start a new test. Although there may be edible parts of the plant you initially chose, it is preferable to move on to a different plant for subsequent tests.
Tick, tock! D-day, are you prepared?
In the event of a government shutdown, just how prepared are you? Let's say you've stock up on all that delicious Ramen I was just talking about--how are you going to defend yourself and your dehydrated noodles?
Yes, that's exactly what I was thinking too. An assault weapons ban goes in to effect in Maryland tomorrow, the same day as the potential government shutdown. Coincidence? I think not! I recommend picking up an AR-15 right now so that you can defend your food against unwanted human intruders, or bears, or really vicious badgers.
Yes, that's exactly what I was thinking too. An assault weapons ban goes in to effect in Maryland tomorrow, the same day as the potential government shutdown. Coincidence? I think not! I recommend picking up an AR-15 right now so that you can defend your food against unwanted human intruders, or bears, or really vicious badgers.
Friday, September 27, 2013
Ramen.
Previously I haven't given much attention to Ramen noodles, mostly because everyone knows how cheap and delicious they are--perfect for the starving federal employee.
But I wanted to dedicate this section to all things Ramen.
First of all, my favorite Ramen flavors:
When I was a kid, you buy these for 10 cents a piece! Inflation and the economy has hurt us all, but you can still find them for under 50 cents in most grocery stores.
Taste the rainbow:
I recommend watching a movie about Ramen. You have two choices here, there really is no right or wrong answer.
1. Watch this YouTube video about what Ramen does to your body when you eat it:
2. Watch the movie The Ramen Girl staring Brittany Murphy (RIP)
But I wanted to dedicate this section to all things Ramen.
First of all, my favorite Ramen flavors:
- Oriental--a classic, albeit maybe a little racist
- Picante Beef--East meets West with this lesser known gem
- Chicken--Another classic
- Pork--oink oink Ramen lovers!
- Canjun Chicken--No need to visit NOLA, it's ready in under 3 minutes!
When I was a kid, you buy these for 10 cents a piece! Inflation and the economy has hurt us all, but you can still find them for under 50 cents in most grocery stores.
Taste the rainbow:
I recommend watching a movie about Ramen. You have two choices here, there really is no right or wrong answer.
1. Watch this YouTube video about what Ramen does to your body when you eat it:
2. Watch the movie The Ramen Girl staring Brittany Murphy (RIP)
Rob Peter to Pay Paul (or whatever your name is)
Did you know that if you are a government employee and you get furloughed, you may not be receiving any retroactive pay? Tough luck, right? Not so fast! You may be eligible for temporary unemployment insurance!
Check your local state regulations on the subject for further information. If you're in Maryland, you can go here:
http://www.dllr.state.md.us/employment/claimfaq.shtml
That's right, if the Federal government won't pay you, take it from your local government! It's likely corrupt anyway.
Check your local state regulations on the subject for further information. If you're in Maryland, you can go here:
http://www.dllr.state.md.us/employment/claimfaq.shtml
That's right, if the Federal government won't pay you, take it from your local government! It's likely corrupt anyway.
Thursday, September 26, 2013
It's the most wonderful time of the year!
Another threat of government shutdown, another post about saving pennies in preparation!
Today, blissfully unaware of the risks of government shutdown, I headed over to the gourmet food trucks, and slapped down $12 for a food truck pizza pie. I came back in to the office and was told to prep for government shut down! I immediately wanted to puke up my $12 lunch and save it for later.
This on the back of making a generous donation of quinoa to the "Feds Feed Families" Food drive! I wonder if these food banks will give feds their food back? Lima beans and blue box Kraft macaroni and cheese are your friends in desperate times, folks!
So, here's a list of for items for under $12 which I should have purchased instead of a gourmet food truck pizza.
You can get 12 of these for $12, they don't taste great, but when you're on a budget you may not have a choice:
Another frozen treat are these bad boys, one of my favorite food options growing up. More expensive than the Michelina's, but the packaging is way cool.
And if you're up for doing some real old fashioned cooking, or maybe you're so poor from this furlough that you had to pawn your microwave, this is always a classic option:
Or maybe, you're like me, and you'd just like to drink your calories. There is a size here for everyone, and even the largest size is under $12.
Today, blissfully unaware of the risks of government shutdown, I headed over to the gourmet food trucks, and slapped down $12 for a food truck pizza pie. I came back in to the office and was told to prep for government shut down! I immediately wanted to puke up my $12 lunch and save it for later.
This on the back of making a generous donation of quinoa to the "Feds Feed Families" Food drive! I wonder if these food banks will give feds their food back? Lima beans and blue box Kraft macaroni and cheese are your friends in desperate times, folks!
So, here's a list of for items for under $12 which I should have purchased instead of a gourmet food truck pizza.
You can get 12 of these for $12, they don't taste great, but when you're on a budget you may not have a choice:
Another frozen treat are these bad boys, one of my favorite food options growing up. More expensive than the Michelina's, but the packaging is way cool.
And if you're up for doing some real old fashioned cooking, or maybe you're so poor from this furlough that you had to pawn your microwave, this is always a classic option:
Or maybe, you're like me, and you'd just like to drink your calories. There is a size here for everyone, and even the largest size is under $12.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)







